| Crossbow Happy and Deliberately Infected with Anthrax |
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| The Final Countdown..I shall keep you updated. |
[09 Feb 2010|02:58am] |
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Love is a killer-Vixen |
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Monday, February 8th.- worked from 3:30 pm until 1am...ended the day with 111%.
Today went by fast.. it was huge for a monday.. usually we get out at 7:30-8ish.. not today, I didn't mind..mild panic ensued when the pallet I was hauling collapsed.. spilling lightbulbs into the aisles...still ONE HUNDRED AND ELEVEN PERCENT!. By my convoluted calculations I began probation on December 11th..So my Eval. should come on thursday.. that being 90 days. However I was told they had to give me 90 WORKING days.. not counting days off or days I was called off.. cause if that's the case.. well fuck, I don't know and I'll just live in fear until they call my name over the PA. No matter what happens.. right now I really thankful that I am with this man. Not just because Valentines Dayis coming up
he's seriously been so fantastic and supportive, and still manages to make my heart all a-twitter. Lovelovelovekisskissblahblahblah
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| shock and d'awwwww |
[30 Jan 2010|11:44pm] |
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I have just returned from Wixom, Michigan. A strange place where the 7-11's do not carry Sparks but the Walgreens across the street do..18 year-olds raid their mother's medicine cabinet and try to get you to buy Belladonna Alkaloids....(bahahahahahahaha)and WE CAN HEAR YOU IN THERE WITH THAT DRIPPY ASS DICK! I'm drinking Panther Joose and I still don't have internet at my apartment but i have alcohol..a wonderful boyfriend..fantastic friends..a family that finally loves me and retarded pets..but mostly alcohol. I also tryed to shave my pubes into the shape of a triangle.. I think i got a yield sign.
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| If you wanna hang you better bring a rope because the only way you'll hang is by your throat |
[24 Jan 2010|11:09pm] |
ALWAYS MAKE SURE YOUR VIRUS PROTECTION IS UP TODATE WHILE VISITING PORN SITES!!
This,labies and genitals,is why I haven't been around. I caught a virus..it wiped out all my shit..comcast won't support anything lower than Windows Xp and whaddya know.. I AIN'T GOT A WINDOWS XP DISC!!!. So here I am, at my complexes office on their shitty computer risking checkin in once at the risk of getting hacked(also drinking Sparks and eating mustard pretzels). It will be about 2 weeks before I get enough money to buy a new XP disc..grrr. but if any of you have an easier solution for me could you please for the love of fuck and internets please call me ..on second thought..don't call me..
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[15 Jan 2010|09:57pm] |
I learned it from you MOMMY!! I learned it from YOU!
Also..friends and trolls..I got a question for ya.
Can a man ever be "JUST FRIENDS" with a woman?...
...and for that matter, can a woman ever be "JUST FRIENDS" with a man?
or do things like genital and or desire and or significant others..gotta come between us??
Don't worry.. I'm not thinking of having anyone or their genitals get in the middle of me and Zac.. We aren't into that sort of thing..ok well I am he's not.. and only if your another dude. But seriously though plunge your depths on this one and we will reconvene for a discussion later.
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| wishful draining. |
[15 Jan 2010|01:56am] |
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gin-the tigerlilies |
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I wish I dated a man who loved me enough to pop the occasional GIGANTIC pimple I get on my cheek or chin..always in the same place..never quite coming to the surface..always excruciating when accidentally knocked. I had an ex who liked for me to pop his pimples. It was odd but rather soothing.. in a primal grooming kinda way. I DID NOT DESCEND FROM A MONKEY!! but it was kinda like that.
Seriously I will pay someone 5 bucks to come and stick a pin in this motherfucker.It hurts and it's messing up my sideways silhouette. I'm hoping that it will go away if I drink enough....
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| Further proof that I'm awesome..awesomely drunk. |
[08 Jan 2010|03:09am] |
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Pretty in Pink-The Psychadelic Furs |
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"Elle, the first time I met you..you were shitfaced. You had a string of blue condoms wrapped around your neck and you were doublefisting a Sparks and something in a martini glass you claimed you had "stolen from the next door neighbors". You wrapped your arms around me and exclaimed "OH I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU!!!!".. We had just met." - My friend Audrey.
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| Frankie says "Relax". I say "Rock Me Amadeus". |
[05 Jan 2010|12:29am] |
Last night, the roof fell in on my parents garage,
I accidentally locked myself out of the home of the child I was babysitting,
I didn't graduate high school,
All my teeth fell out
and when I woke up there was a grotesque talking pig sitting on my bed...
...and then I woke up again.
State of mind = Not so good.
Also..HEY !! here's a really old photo of me...the guy who took it had a very inappropriate relationship with his dogs and stole a few pairs of my nylons.
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| Dear Apartment Complex... |
[01 Jan 2010|06:29am] |
Since you failed to fix the problem with my floor,which is still damp and beginning to mildew, I am afraid I have stolen your industrial floor fan for the time being.
I kicked off my New Year with exiting work at 3am(I started at 3pm), drank a Sparks..threw up from sheer exhaustion..had a good cry on Zac's shoulder and went to bed. I say this not to be bitter or rueful but I do hope you all had a better New Year's then me.
lovelovelovekisskissblahblahblah,
Elle
Update: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! after keeping the industrial fan for about most of the morning. I returned it to the hallway from whence it came and walked down to the office. The problem is the padding under the carpet is still soaked and I explained this to the secretary who once again called maintenance, who came over...their solution :TO PLACE THE INDUSTRIAL FAN BACK IN MY LIVING ROOM !! ahahahahahahah!
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| All hail TFSM!! |
[30 Dec 2009|07:59pm] |
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have you been touched by his noodly appendage?
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[29 Dec 2009|12:54pm] |
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I'm writing to you from what might as well be a basement apartment in Venice.
CUZ MY APARTMENT IS FLOODED!!
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| Oh Sweet Death, One Last Caress.. |
[27 Dec 2009|01:55pm] |
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"That fucking girl has been playing Conway Twitty and The Misfits over and over again for the past hour."-My neighbor.
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| Necky and other poor clothing choices. |
[23 Dec 2009|12:36am] |
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Bring The Pain-MSI |
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https://www.buynecky.com/flare/next
Just watch the advertisement
Seriously, the Snuggie for your neck, cuz you can't tie your own damn scarf.
Hey, here's some more saliva hocked in the face of human aptitude!!!
http://www.cracked.com/article/224_5-clothing-innovations-that-will-be-annoying-you-soon/
Aroma-THERAPY!! clothing, that's right!! let everyone know how your feeling BECAUSE THEY CAN FUCKING SMELL IT!!! I mean sure humans are animals.. I just didn't know we were supposed to resemble skunks. While we are letting the world know our personal business we might as well just squat and do it in a corner.
also!!
I'm going xmas shopping tommorow. I've got my mace and machete ready, Could probably use that Stab Skirt too...
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| A little black dress stuck to a little hot mess |
[22 Dec 2009|01:09am] |
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Supertheory of Supereverything-Gogol Bordello |
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I have consistently pickled myself every night for the past 2 weeks, some one is either gonna have to stick me on a slice of ham with some creamcheese and just FUCKIN EAT ME!(that sounds really good) or I'm gonna have to lay off the sauce ::pokes tummy::.....give my stomach some time to re-upholster itself.
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| Personality Test |
[20 Dec 2009|05:25pm] |
My Personality
| | Neuroticism | | Extraversion | | Openness to Experience | | Agreeableness | | Conscientiousness | |
| You do not feel nervous in social situations, and have a good impression of what others think of you, however you feel strong cravings and urges that you have difficulty resisting. You tend to prefer short-term pleasures and rewards over long-term consequences. You lead a leisurely and relaxed life. You would prefer to sit back and smell the roses than indulge in high energy activities. You enjoy a certain amount of debate or intellectual thought, but sometimes get bored with too much. You will help others if they are in need. If people ask for too much of your time you feel that they are imposing on you, however you believe that a certain amount of deception in social relationships is necessary. You are guarded in new relationships and less willing to openly reveal the whole truth about yourself. You find yourself procrastinating and show poor follow-through on tasks. Often you fail to complete tasks - even tasks that you want very much to complete.
| Free Poll
promise rings |
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[19 Dec 2009|11:10pm] |
Avatar= Fern Gully...but on acid.
FUNNY MOMENT AT MY EXPENSE MOMENT!!!
I lost my phone at work yesterday. It fell out of my pocket while I was playing bumpercars with pallets of product. My supervisor found it and when I came to the desk to claim it he asked the standard security "what does it look like question" I could have just said that it was a little black phone with my employee Id on it.. BUT NOOOOO!! Instead I blurted "It's a little black phone that says "Ellegasm" on it!!!". My supervisor turned bright red and handed me my phone back.
I don't believe I've mentioned lately how much I enjoy Korpiklaani.
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